Friday, March 21, 2014

I'm starting to ❤ Berlin

credit
As soon as my husband walked through the door on Wednesday I jumped off the sofa and announced I needed to run errands in the city, by myself.   Sophie had the stomach flu since Saturday.  Aside from going to the doctor and pharmacy I hadn't left our apartment all week.  It was nothing but endless loops of children's programing and washing out one set of pajamas after another.   I was about to go crazy. 

It's been months since I went anywhere without my daughter.  Getting things done with a toddler is not as easy as I imagined.  I thought toddlers would be easier than babies but no, they present a new set of challenges.  Babies don't have opinions.  Babies do not throw tantrums or refuse to wear their coats.  Babies don't hide their shoes or attempt to run in front of moving cars.  They don't refuse to sit in their strollers or hit the dog on the nose when they get sick of playing tug-of-war.  You will never find yourself negotiating with a baby or pleading for two more minutes of good behavior so you can check out at the grocery store. 

Every activity revolves around my daughter.  All my social interactions happen at her classes, play dates, groups and doctor's appointments.  I can't go to any restaurant or cafe that doesn't have some type of play area.  I spend most of my time with my family in our apartment.  Some days I would like to go places but her nap time is too early or late so we don't go.  When I get time off it's usually late in the evening.  By that time there isn't much I can do besides read, watch tv or surf the Internet.  Those things are fun but they aren't fulfilling. 

Minus child and stroller, my baby bag lighter by ten pounds I got more accomplished in one hour than I normally would in three.  Potsdamer Platz in the evening is great.  It has a big city vibe.  The weather was cool and the pavement was wet from resent rain but it was still mild enough to feel like Spring.  Without my husband or child to define me, I was just another woman running errands.  It felt really, really good to be in the city alone.  I started to kindle a little spark of love for Berlin.  It didn't hurt that it was the first time I went downtown without needing the navi or making any wrong turns.  :)

x
Sara

Sunday, March 16, 2014

Berlin learning curve


Dear Internet,

I have nothing to talk about but my child went to bed at six o'clock so here we go.

Sophie is sick and the weather is bad so I spent all day watching Youtube clips of Baby Einstein and I felt like part of my brain might have died. Then we watched the Little Mermaid and the patriarchy made me uncomfortable.  I started thinking about the roles of black actors in Disney cartoons and I just don't know if there is going to be any more Little Mermaid in our house.  My daughter is probably going to grow up thinking I am an anti-fun politically correct tyrant.  Don't your best intentions always somehow backfire?  If anyone has any suggestions on how they plan on handling the Barbie, Disney, and Princesses please let me know.  At least we live in Germany right now.

For some reason, despite being super busy, I seem to have found time to watch a lot of tv lately.  I loved the first season of Vikings so hard and now I'm watching the second season and waiting to see if it's also awesome but I don't have any feelings yet.  Also, True Detective!  Woody Harrelson being Texas and serious and scary.  And I am trying to love House of Cards but meh.  I guess it's ok?  Sometimes the Walking Dead is fantastic and sometimes it's just so awful that I feel cheated out of Zombie Monday.


My hair is a little better but the highlights I got to cover my gray are super light.  The rest of my hair is super dark so... yeah.  Not very many women are sporting natural looking in Berlin these days.  Did I hop in a time capsule and go back fifteen years?  When it comes to hair color I did.  I am struggling not to feel embarrassed every time I have social interactions with people.  Are they judging me on how I look?  You betcha.  So if you don't know me and you meet me for the first time, please know I did not choose to have Brandenburg village highlights.  Sometimes these things just happen.

I went to the Zara at Potsdamer Platz in Berlin for the first time.  The sales associate projected so much condescension and dislike that I got a little freaked out.  Why was she being so rude to me?  Was it my hair?  My age?  My child?  My accent?  The fact that I was returning some stuff?  All of the above?  Anyway she tried to find reasons why I couldn't return my items.  She even tried to claim my receipt was a copy and not the original.  She managed to look disgusted and personally offended that one item was slightly wrinkled.  In the end she couldn't refuse me service because the tags were on and everything was in order.   I love Zara but it's not like they are a luxury clothing retailer so I don't understand why their staff is so awful.  It's times like this when I miss home. 


The weather has been so nice!  One day we were too tired to walk to the park but it was too warm and sunny to stay inside.  I remembered that we have a big balcony I've been completely ignoring since we moved in.  I moved some of Sophie's toys and we got to be in the sun for hours.  It was great.  We ordered her a little sand/water play table and over the next few months I'll be thinking about making it into an extra sort of room.  Some days I just want to stay home.  Let this be the year I plant flower boxes AND remember to water them. 

Since moving to Berlin I seem to plagued by stressful mistakes.  Like not being able to find my exact parking garage, getting ridiculous parking tickets, getting lost, driving into tunnels where there's no way to turn around (seriously beware of the Tiergarten tunnel!), missing my turns and other silly things that make going anywhere and everywhere a pain.  I never know where I'm going, I don't know where anything is and it makes life hard.  But it's ok, because that's part of moving to a new city.  One day I will get the hang of things.  It's taking a long time because Berlin is big and confusing.  Until then I just have to deal with not knowing.  And now that the weather is nice I'm going to rethink taking the train places.  Is changing trains with a toddler in tow more stressful than driving into a tunnel by mistake?  I am going to find out.

x
Sara

Thursday, February 27, 2014

The USA vs. Germany: violence

Hi everyone!  Hi Internet!  I should be cleaning and packing for our trip to Prague tomorrow.  I should be handling very important adult paper work stuff but do you know what?  That's no fun and kind of depressing.  So I decided to finish some research I started ages ago.  This is how I procrastinate you guys, I do research.   Anyway.

source
 A long time ago I started gathering data on which country was better to live in.  Not based on individual opinions, but cold numerical stuff.  My research was really interesting.  Life got in the way, we moved and I never posted it.  I like things about both countries, though I haven't lived in the USA for a long time.  Since I don't have a favorite I tried to be as non biased as possible so I could give a clear picture.  To be fair to everyone I sited all of my sources so you don't have to take my word for it.  Feel free to slog through the data yourselves :)   I have so much data to go over that I split it up to make it less confusing.  This post deals with violence.  I also have data on stuff like gender equality, health care and cost of living.  That will all be coming soon. 

Gun Violence

The first thing I wanted to know about was gun violence.  Every time I read the American news there is another random shooting but does that really mean America is a dangerous place to live?  Germans limit who can carry a gun so naturally, they have less gun violence than the USA.  I noticed a funny trend, the less gun violence the less other violence a country has.  It's as if having the capacity to commit a crime might make people more likely to follow through.  Let's start with school shootings.

School shootings-
The USA has had over sixty school shootings since 1996. for a population of 313.9 million people.  Calculated statistic: .2 
Germany has had 4 school shootings since 1996. for a population of 81.891 million people.  Calculated statistic: .049

Conclusion- per number of people the USA has four times as many school shootings as Germany.  I did the math for you and no surprise, much of our violent crime findings will follow this trend. 

Source

Intentional homocide-

USA had 12,996- 4.2
Germany- 690- 0.8

Germany has less than a forth of the intentional homicide as the USA.

Source

Sexual assault

Reported rape, sexual assault, bodily harm per 100,000 people

Germany 9.1
USA 32.0

Germany has a little bit less than a third of the reported sexual assaults than the USA.  Good to know.  

Source 1, Source 2

Child abuse and neglect, Infant and Mother Mortality Rate

My research on this subject turned up some really interesting information that I didn't know.   Like it's illegal to hit your kids in many Northern European countries, including Germany.  

Corporal punishment is prohibited in the home. A 2000 amendment to the Civil Code states (article 1631): “Children have the right to a non-violent upbringing. Corporal punishment, psychological injuries and other humiliating measures are prohibited.” German childcare law was amended to place a duty on authorities to “promote ways in which families can resolve conflict without resort to force”. 

'The Report Card also presents new research summarizing the present legal status of physical punishment in all OECD member countries.  Overall it shows that only seven of those countries – Austria, Denmark, Finland, Germany, Iceland, Norway and Sweden – currently have laws explicitly banning physical punishment of children.'
source, source

About forty percent of Germans don't know that their is a law against hitting their kids but overall Germans have a more negative view of corporal punishments with most of them agreeing to the statement that children have a right to a violence free environment.  There is also a link between adult violence and violence against children: 

'The research also establishes that a clear relationship seems to exist between levels of child death from maltreatment and the levels of violence in society as a whole.  The countries with the lowest rates of child deaths from maltreatment also have very low rates of adult deaths from assault.  Similarly, the three nations with exceptionally high levels of child deaths from maltreatment also have exceptionally high adult death rates.'   

That means that if on average USA has 684,500 substantiated child abuse cases a year then we would assume Germany to have about a fourth of that.  I haven't found any concrete information in English on child abuse in Germany.  I could research it more but researching child abuse is really depressing so I'll stick with the assumption.  

Robbery

Cases of robbery per 100,000 in the USA: 133
Cases of robbery per 100,000 in Germany: 60

This surprised me a little bit because I thought Germany would have about the same amount of theft as the US but it is also lower by almost two thirds.

source

Assault

Cases of assault per 100,000 in the USA: 262
Cases of assault per 100,000 in Germany: 630

Before you start thinking that you are almost three times more likely to be assaulted in Germany, this chart came with a disclaimer saying that you can not accurately compare assault because each country has a varying definition of what assault constitutes. 

Burglary

Cases of burglary per 100,000 in the USA: 715
Cases of burglary per 100,000 in Germany: 456

I also thought that there would be more burglary in Germany because I know a few people who had their houses robbed but it's significantly lower.

Vehicle theft

Cases of vehicle theft per 100,000 in the USA: 258
Cases of vehicle theft per 100,000 in Germany: 106


I couldn't find any statistics on how much more likely your is to be set on fire during a May Day protest but I'm pretty sure Germany would beat the US on that count. 

Conclusion:  Germany seems to be an overall safer place to live.   Ok, I'm going to go pack some stuff now.

x
Sara

Sunday, February 9, 2014

The weather is taunting me

While the USA is having a long and snowy Winter we're over here enjoying very mild weather.  We've had about two weeks of real Winter.  It got cold and I was very sad.  I couldn't walk my dog, my child was cranky and I gave up on fun snow days that always ended in tears.   It didn't last very long.  This week the weather turned around.  It warmed up, all the snow melted.  It's been sunny every single day.  

I didn't get to enjoy it at all.  First Sophie was sick and then I got sick.  I've been looking at the fabulous sunny weather from my couch surrounded by own snow storm of tissues feeling like there isn't enough bad reality tv in the world to keep me entertained.  I already read all my library books but I'm not well enough to go out and get more.  We had tons of super fun plans last week but ended up canceling them all.  Boo.  

I'm pretty sure by Monday I have to be better. 

I only hope the nice weather keeps it up.  I would be terribly sad if I missed the only sunny week.

x
Sara